ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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