3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
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