Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
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