Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
wow bdsm is so cute
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
