We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
