i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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