i permit you to call me
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize