I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
