Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
