I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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