you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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