at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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