I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
