Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
