We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
