WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize