im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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