brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
