Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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