Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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