wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
