the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize