My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Randomize
