just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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