i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
