the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
