dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize