its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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