Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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