Christians are straight up FREAKS
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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