So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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