"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
