Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
