This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
