How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
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