all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
