have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Randomize
