so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
