Screwed.edu
no, he came in my armpit
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
