Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
