The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
