You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
