Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
