he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
A+ Viking dick
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
