also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Do vagina's smell?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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