Your tits are I can't wait for
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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