At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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