i need an iv and a liver transplant
Screwed.edu
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
