i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Randomize
