I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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