I feel like abortions should bother me more
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
There's always time for handjobs
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize